Richard Sussman, Licensed Therapist
Individual Counseling Can Help You Feel Empowered And Alive
Has Life Lost Its Luster And Meaning?
You Are Not Alone
Are you feeling down, depleted and like you’re just not good enough? Do you often feel on edge, consumed with stress or caught in a constant state of worry about what happened yesterday and/or what tomorrow might bring? Perhaps you’re struggling to relate with your partner, wondering how to create meaning and connection in what has become an unsatisfying partnership. Or, maybe you’re not fulfilled at work and desire to make more money or find increased satisfaction and empowerment through your career. Do you often experience low energy or a lack of aliveness and feel ruled by fear rather than love, hope or confidence? Do you wish you could learn to love yourself and be loved and accepted by others just as you are? Do you want to let go of negative thoughts and fears and begin living a truly empowered, balanced and meaningful life?
Everyone goes through low points when life seems to have lost its luster and stress, worries and uncertainties take a strong hold. During these down periods, it’s not uncommon to feel lost, lonely and inadequate. You may worry that something vital is lacking in your life, but can’t quite identify what is missing or when you started feeling so disconnected. Activities that you once enjoyed may now feel mundane or have lost their appeal altogether. If you’re struggling with relationships or in your professional life, your self-esteem may have plummeted, causing you to turn inward and disconnect from the people in your life even more. Feelings of sadness, guilt or anger may be consuming you to the point that it’s hard to stay present and function in the world in a way that feels good.
You Are Not Alone
Feelings of unworthiness, uncertainty and dissatisfaction are seemingly epidemic in our culture. We are, in essence, a society of negative thinking. Studies show that each person has an average of 60,000 thoughts a day, 95 percent of which are repeated every day. And, of all those habitual thoughts, a whooping 80 percent of them are negative! As humans, we are hardwired to pay more attention to negative experiences than positive ones. This was critical for survival during periods of evolution and can occasionally still serve us well when danger is present. However, in today’s world, very few of us are in a perpetual state of danger. Most of our negative thinking stems from messages that we are separate and must be beautiful, accomplish great feats and accumulate wealth in order to be “whole.” Losses, significant life transitions, traumas and daily stress can also trigger ailments like depression and anxiety, which can rob us of our aliveness, cause feelings of inadequacy and keep us questioning the purpose and meaning of our lives.
Feelings of inadequacy and unhappiness have become the cultural norm, but you don’t have to live that way. If feelings of perpetual anger or sadness, anxious thoughts, lack energy or defensiveness are impacting your ability to experience joy, meaning and productivity in your life, an experienced therapist can help you reframe your perceptions of yourself and your experience. With help, you can begin living a life of balance, intimacy and joy.
Individual Counseling Can Help You Feel Empowered And Alive
When we experience anxiety, depression or other emotional conflicts, the most common reaction is to resist or avoid. Most people will do anything to not feel discomfort. But, unless feelings are experienced openly and with full awareness, they go “underground,” obstruct full expression and drain vitality. In order to flourish, you must face painful feelings and heed their message. These feelings are often wakeup calls that can help you integrate the previously unaddressed parts of yourself. When you develop this awareness, you can realize your full potential and live in your wholeness.
In safe, nonjudgmental individual therapy sessions, I will support you in opening to the difficult aspects of your life. Through a process of awareness and acceptance, I can help you transform anxiety into peacefulness, anger into resoluteness, fear into fearlessness and sadness into compassion. Through sessions, you can also begin to realize that there is not – nor has there ever been – anything wrong with you. There were only things that you were told and then believed that made you think that you were less than whole. Through various forms of spiritual therapy and more traditional psychodynamic approaches, I can help you see, accept and let go of your perceived deficiencies and complexes so that you can connect to the radiance of your essential nature.
In adult counseling sessions, we’ll also explore and dispel unproductive mindsets. You can begin to realize that all that happens is essentially out of your control, which can elicit relief and a sense of freedom. I’ll encourage you to take responsibility for you life; however, once you understand that was has happened, is happening and will happen in your life could not have happened or will not happen any other way, you can let of guilt, shame, anxiety and fear. Once we break down your stories and fears, you can begin to learn healthy ways to express yourself. You can experience situations, rather than act out or withdraw. You can turn complaints into requests. You can reframe how you talk to yourself and others and quell self-created, unproductive misconceptions about who you are.
With the help of a compassionate, skilled therapist and an effective approach to healing, it’s possible to feel more fulfilled, shift out of negative thinking and accept yourself and your experience completely. There’s no need to continue suffering. Once you accept and let go, you create space for positive change. By fully embracing your emotions and experience, pain can dissipate. You can cultivate a sense of ease, enjoy peacefulness and live a life of joy.
I tried individual therapy in the past and it didn’t help. How could or would this experience be any different?
The key to successful therapy is finding a therapist who you can relate to and feel comfortable with. Effective therapy is also contingent on your desire and willingness to grow, evolve and embrace change. A poor experience with therapy in the past, while unfortunate, does not mean that therapy can and will not work for you. With a trusting therapeutic relationship, the right approach and a willingness to shift perspective, you can experience significant results in individual counseling.
I’m afraid that talking about my feelings and issues will make me feel worse than I already do.
Whether you are talking about your feelings or not, they are still there. In order to truly become unstuck and experience relief from depression, you need to deconstruct the stories you’ve been telling yourself and shift into a new and healthier perspective. And, although it may feel scary to think about sharing your experience with another person and really feel your feelings, doing so often comes with so much relief. I’ll never push you to disclose anything you’re not ready to. We can move at a pace that feels comfortable for you.
I’ve heard that adult counseling is expensive and can take a lot of time.
While therapy does require a time and financial investment, it is a temporary process that can help you shift the course of your life. If you’re struggling in one or many aspects of life, I invite you to consider therapy as a critical investment into your wellbeing. Through shifting perspective, increasing self-awareness, coming to a place of acceptance and embracing change, you can not only experience relief but also truly enjoy increased productivity and more happiness in your life.